He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
