Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
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