drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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