They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
