dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
