I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You have to summon your inner elephant
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
