They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
