Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
