You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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