you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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