eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I have tasted many bathrooms
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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