Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.

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(801): View more from Utah

I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"

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(714): View more from California

im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.

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(289): View more from Ontario

Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working

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(773): View more from Illinois

I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?

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