She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
