Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
