There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
