just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize
