let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
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