I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize