why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
