Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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