I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
