What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
