It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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