I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
