if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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