Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
