Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
