Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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