You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
She made me pour olive oil on her.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
