I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
