Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
