.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
