turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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