if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
bring money and cleavage
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
