you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
