so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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