Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
