you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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