She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
