hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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