the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
