the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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