I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize