Whoa Z and x make the same sound
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
