I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize