Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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