Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Randomize
