dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
