yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize