I heard we made out
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
