I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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